And you definitely could not touch someone of the other sex. If you are in the same space, you must be cordial, but keep talking to a bare minimum,” said David.Apart from the rules about not engaging with the other sex until it was time to select a mate, there was no sex education.I was thinking about what kind of life trajectory let this fascinating fellow—let’s call him David—to be at this bar in Bushwick at this time.He was still clearly connected to his faith, but also living a vastly different life from others in his community.I can’t live in a depressing hell because God said so.” So David decided to start dating.He found his first couple of dates through Craigslist. It wasn’t so much that he wanted to have sex; he just craved a real connection.He spoke about how he had a strong desire to connect with girls, and he could tell that girls also wanted to talk to him.He fought that temptation because he felt that every act he committed would defy the honor of his family and would oppose God.
David ideologically agrees with everything that he’s learned from the Torah. If you aren’t aspiring to something that's higher than you, then who cares? To my delight, David described himself as an open book, and we met for a chat.Although I asked him about many components of his life, I focused most on understanding his experience with relationships and sexuality.“Eventually it got to a point where I thought, ‘Screw this.What God wants doesn’t align with my wants, but let me have my life and my desires.
So David decided to move to Bushwick and experience freedom.